Sunday, January 11, 2015

A Surprise We Get To Wait For

Dear Tiny Human Inside My Body,

You are only the size of a strawberry, but you are already so loved. I don't feel like we know each other very well yet, but you have your suttle ways of letting me know you are there. You have already turned me against Oreos and you are working on turning me against Chipotle, which you may or may not realize, but these are (were) my two favorite foods. I'm hoping this is just temporary.

For the next eight months, the two of us are going to start getting to know each other. You may think I'm already a pro at the whole - being pregnant thing, but this pregnancy feels like my first. This sounds confusing, because you have an older brother! Someday, you will understand what I'm talking about. Lets just say, you have made yourself known way before Landon decided to. But don't worry, we will learn together and I will do everything possible to keep you safe and prepare you to enter into this world as a healthy, beautiful, baby.

This is your Papa!

He is the best, hardest working man I know. He was so excited when I told him you existed. He is fun, loving, smart, and will make sure the two of us are raising you the way we need to. You will soon learn, he is the best in the world at swaddling! 

This is your big brother!

He is two and full of energy. Believe it or not, he understands your existence. Every day he points to my belly and says, "Baby in there? Mama have baby?" Now, whether or not he knows what he is in for by gaining a sibling, is a mystery, but he knows you are in there. And he thinks you are a girl! If we ask him if he is going to have a brother or a sister, he responds, "Sister! A girl!" Maybe you are a girl, or maybe he thinks you are a girl because Daniel The Tiger's mama had a girl. He is a special little boy, maybe its his intuition.

Speaking of gender, I think we are indifferent. Part of me thinks it would be fun to have all little boys! But another part of me would love to have girl! I loved having a big brother growing up and I'm sure Landon would be great with a little sister (and he may not have to share his cars as much).

This is me, your mama.

You are only nine weeks into development, but I already can't wait for your arrival. I can't wait to see what you will look like and what your personality will be. I'll do my best to figure out what calms you down the fastest and we will hopefully fall into a nursing routine as soon as possible. I promise to make you feel safe, encourage you, and to love you unconditionally. 

I feel like I have so much time to prepare for your arrival. 8 WHOLE MONTHS! When Landon was born, I only had eight hours. You are both, already, so wonderfully different. I can't wait to see the two of you interact. I'm sure he will teach you how to stack blocks, and how to run cars down the batman ramp. He will also teach you how to be a picky eater and how to dump water out of the bathtub (which is a sure way to end your bath time just as fast as it started). 

You have so much to learn, but the best thing for you to do now, is to continue to grow into a strong, healthy human being. I can't wait to see how both of us change and develop in the upcoming months. 

The Owner Of The Stomach You Are Currently Renting
Aka: Mama

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

A Baby Doll For Christmas

A month or so ago, Landon and I went with Tyler to a church meeting. Of course, we didn't actually attend the meeting...we spent our time in the play area. This particular church has an awesome kids area. There is a slide, a play kitchen, and basically any toy you could ever want to play with. Landon loves it! And I was taken by surprise when he spent most of his time playing with a baby doll.

He was carrying it around saying, "shh shh shhhh" in the same tone and pattern Tyler and I used to use to get him to go to sleep. He would then loudly announce, "baby sleep!" And then he would pick up the bottle and say, "its hot!" and then he would place it in the fridge for a few seconds before feeding it to the doll. After feeding the doll, he would take the doll and lay it in the crib and say, "Sleep. Goodnight." It was adorable.


Of course we will need to work on how to properly carry a baby...

On the way home, I told Tyler everything and told him I wanted to buy him a baby doll for Christmas. Thankfully, Tyler didn't respond with a - no way is my son going to get a baby doll for Christmas. He immediately agreed it was a good idea.

So, last night, as part of our annual December 9th date, we did some Christmas shopping for Landon. Along with car ramps and Toy Story things, we set out to find a baby doll. I was thinking just a plain, rubber doll would be easy to find. I was wrong. We stood and stared at a wall of baby dolls for at least twenty minutes trying to decide which one to get. I had no idea it would be so hard to find a baby doll that didn't pee, or cry, or talk in a creepy voice. Finally we found what we were looking for. 

Who came up with the idea of "boy toys" and "girl toys." It is very obvious that certain toys are supposed to be for certain genders. There is a little girl holding the doll on this box! Where is the box with a little boy feeding the doll the bottle? Or where is the box with the little girl playing with the hot wheels cars? Who's says a boy can't want a baby doll or a girl can't want some matchbox cars?

I don't want Landon to only love cars, and tractors, trains, and the things society says a little boy should like. If he enjoys playing with baby dolls, then we will encourage it. I also want Landon to know a "manly" man is not a man with muscles that hunts and build's big things, and drives huge trucks. Those things are all fine, but they don't define a real man. In my opinion, a real man loves and nurtures as well as a woman. 

And who knows, maybe this baby will help prepare him for a future sibling. Starting with not carrying them around by their arms ;-)

Monday, December 8, 2014

Countdown to TWO!

In just four short days, Landon will officially be TWO! To be honest, some days, I feel like we have already entered into the "terrible two" stage of life. And for those of you who think three is worse than two, keep that to yourselves ;-)

Minus his insane tantrums that happen every few days, I am loving this stage of his life. I love hearing whats going on in his creative mind. I love how great of a memory he has and how he can throughly describe events that happened weeks ago. For example, we took him to a Walleye hockey game last month and he HATED the horn that goes off when the teams scores. He hated it so much, he refused to even sit in the arena. If you have ever been to a Toledo Walleye game, you have probably seen the giant fish that floats around in between quarters (are they called quarters? I know nothing about hockey.) It looks like this:

So every now and then Landon will say, "Hockey game. Fish was loud. Scared." A broken sentence, but a sentence non the less and I love being able to hear what he thinking about. Listening to him talk is my newest favorite thing about being his mama.

Last year at this time, My favorite thing was watching him attempt to walk. I remember how excited we where we he took his first steps. And YES! We got it on film!


I'm not sad over the idea of him getting older. I'm finding myself enjoying his next stages of life even more than I enjoyed the last! I loved when he was cuddly and let me hold him as long as I wanted, but now I love that he talks and actually plays and uses his imagination! I loved when he was completely dependent on me, but now I love his growing independence. It lets me know he is developing the way he needs to. Everything just keeps getting better. Of course, there are new challenges. He drives me insane with his sudden picky eating, the tantrums he throws when I can't find the specific toy he wants, and heaven forbid if I would rather read a different book than "Curious George Goes To The Baseball Game" for the tenth time in a row (not exaggerating) are all daily occurrences. But for every time I feel like I'm going crazy, he will say something like, "I miss you!" or a good, "Kank (thank) you, Mama!"

This week is so reminiscent. December 8th was when we went on our last twenty mile bike ride as a married couple with no baby. You can read about that here! If it were not freezing here, I would take Landon on a bike ride, just because I feel like it would be appropriate. December 9th marks when I started having contractions and when Tyler  and I had to skip our romantic date and "settle" for Chipotle at home. You can read about that here! December 10th and 11th were hands down, the most painful days of my entire life (If you have been pregnant, you know what I'm talking about.) And December 12th will be two years since Landon Shae decided it was time to come out of hiding and make his grand, surprise entrance.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

First Date

Saturday, I went on a date with a really, handsome boy...And the boy wasn't my husband.

It was with this little guy! He is such a stud!

We started our date at the zoo where we met Landon's little friend, Emerson and her mama, Brittany.  
And they had a great time together!

I love taking Landon to the Toledo zoo, especially now that he can recognize and say the names of the animals. He usually gets most excited about the elephants and monkeys, but more than that, he loves the animal statues.  I could post an entire entry full of pictures of Landon loving on these statues at the Toledo Zoo. I'll spare you, and just share this sweet picture of Landon loving on this large cat:

After the zoo, we went to Landon's all time favorite restaurant. If you know Tyler and I, it will come as no surprise to you, that is his favorite place to eat is...CHIPOTLE! I ate so much Chipotle while I was pregnant with him so I'll just credit that to his little obsession. If you have ever eaten there, you know how big these burrito bowls are. Landon and I "share" one and when I say, "share" I really mean Landon literally eats over half of it which means he eats more than I do.

After he indulged in over half of our his burrito bowl, we made the executive decision to go get a cupcake from a little place called Cake In A Cup. They make delicious cupcakes. I let Landon pick from two and he picked Cookies and Cream...he is my child for sure!

He doesn't particularly like sweets, but he ate the entire cupcake, minus the two bites he let me have. He even ate the Oreo on the top. 

When he was tiny, I always thought about what it would be like to take this little guy on "dates." I wanted our mama/son dates to be different than every other day we spend together. So when we got up the cashier, I told Landon since we were on a date and since I drove us, he was going to "pay!" I handed him the magic, green, card and he handed it to the lady. After she swiped it, she handed it back to him. He was so excited!
(Special thanks to the cashier for being patient and so sweet with Landon)

I want to teach him what it means to be a gentleman. We want Landon to see what it means to treat a woman with respect. Apposed to the way society views women and how they are "shown off" more like objects than people (I could write an entire entry about my thoughts on this.) Tyler is a perfect example for Landon...he has been opening the car door for me since our very first drive together. He will grow up seeing Tyler love me the way every woman deserves to be loved. 

On the other hand, I want Landon to know what it feels like to be respected. Men deserve just as much respect as women do and I want Landon to understand that starting now. He deserves to be treated with love and kindness with no exceptions. 

I'm going to continue to take Landon on dates and I'm sure, as he gets older, they will change. I'm looking forward to conversations that consist of more than toot toots and Curious George. But for now, I'm going to enjoy carrying him from place to place, listening to him talk from the back seat, and him asking ME to hold his hand.

I write this as if I'm ever going to let Landon go on a date with anyone except me.
Just kidding...
Kind of. 

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

My Teacher is 18 Months Old

Last Thursday, we took Landon to see his first fireworks display. I honestly didn't think he would even stay awake long enough to see them. Most nights, around 7:30, he is ready to go to sleep so I figured he would be out before the party even started.

So we planned many attempts to keep him distracted and awake.

We played outside and went for a walk.

And just about the time I thought he was going to crash...

Cousin City arrived!!! (Side Note: For some reason, Landon calls Mason "City." Strange, but cute!) Landon lights up when he sees Mason.

And around 9:30, he was doing this:

And then the show started! I figured it was going to be a hit or miss. He has never liked loud, sudden noises and since fireworks are loud and sudden, I figured he would be terrified and we would be out of there as soon as possible. 

I was wrong. 

He barely moved for an entire twenty five minutes. When Tyler asked him what he thought, he responded with a whispered, "Wow." 

There are few things better than watching your child enjoy and get excited about something. Whether its fireworks or watching a "Toot Toot" drive down the road, Landon has been teaching me to simply enjoy what is happening right in front of me instead of constantly looking at what is going to happen next. 

Landon, I am a firm believer that you teach me more than I teach you. Thank you :) 

Saturday, June 14, 2014

In This Family, We Love.

Who would have ever guessed this sweet, innocent face would ever have to be corrected?!

This calm, sleepy, relaxed baby has turned into a rambunctious, full of energy, very busy (very healthy) eighteen month old. 

He isn't perfect.
There...I said it. And sometimes, he makes "bad choices".

He drops food off of his high chair.
He throws his toys when he gets mad. 
One time, he tripped and fell and got so frustrated he walked across the floor, picked up Cookie Monster, and threw him across the room (side note: He is really good at throwing things. I'm guessing he gets that from his quarterback papa). 
And sometimes...he just doesn't listen.

Most of these are rare, and I understand he is only eighteen months old, but he is never to young to learn the difference between a good choice and a bad choice.

And, I must admit, it can be quite comical to watch because he usually gets mad about really silly things, like not being able to open something or if his blocks fall over when he is stacking them. 
I'm not saying he has an anger problem because he is completely sweet 96% of the time...He is just a little boy who is trying to figure this world out. 

So, as his parents, we are doing our best in guiding him so he chooses a good, productive path.

With that, I give you this:

The Toy Hospital!

Whenever Landon throws a toy out of anger, it goes to the toy hospital. 
The idea is after he throws a toy, he has to pick it up, take it to the toy hospital, and the toy has to stay in the hospital for a whole day so it can heal and feel better. 

As of right now, I don't think he really cares. He usually puts the toy in, says, "Bye!" and toddles back into the living room. But, I'm hoping as he grows, he starts to understand that anger and violence is not the best choice, especially when it is at someone else's expense. 

When Landon was five months old, I wrote about him learning the idea that everything has value and an identity. You can read about that here! I like to think he is beginning to understand that in the Kleeberger family, we love and respect the people in the world and the idea of the Toy Hospital goes along with this. 

So Landon, your toys are your favorite things right now. Most of your friends are plastic batman cars and stuffed Sesame Street characters. But one day, you are going to have living, breathing friends and it is essential that you show them love. And even if someone is not your friend, you must still show them that same love. Practice with your toys now...and maybe someday, you will thank Papa and I for creating a toy hospital.

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Don't Catch Me Mama

Recently, Landon has become inthralled with slides.
It all started in Texas when we went to a water park.

He was leery at first, and refused to budge unless I was holding onto his hand, but by the end of the day, he was going down slides by himself! As soon as he would slide into my arms he would say, "Mama? More?" He had a blast.

And he was exhausted by the end of the day...

Fast forward to a few weeks later, and Landon is STILL fascinated with sliding boards.
I love biking to the park with him. As soon as we pull into the parking lot, I can hear him in his bike trailer saying, "slide slide slide slide." His little, chubby legs can't get him over to the slide fast enough.

He knows to climb up the steps and slide down while I wait to catch him at the bottom.
Or when Tyler goes with us, one of us goes to the top with him and the other waits at the bottom for him...there is no way of him falling or hitting his head or scraping his elbows or knees. He is completely safe because we are right beside him.

However, this particular day, I was by myself.
Everything was going great. He was content with this small slide and was having a great time!


Then, he decided he wanted to try a different slide. 
A slide that required him to step up and then sit down. Not to mention it was inclosed, so there was no way for me to help him from the ground. 

So I thought to myself:
     I can't NOT be there to catch him when he slides down. What if he can't stop himself...duh, he can't stop himself, he has no idea how to do that. He will fly out of the slide and he could hit his head. 
     But if I'm at the bottom, he won't be able to step up into the slide and sit down on his own and if he tries, there is no way he is going to make it without getting hurt.
     But, he really wants to go down that slide. He is even signing, "please." Ok, Vanessa, don't be a helicopter parent. 

So, I helped him into the slide, he sat down, and down he went! 


Without me! Without me at the bottom to catch him! And guess what, he didn't fall, he didn't hit his head, and he went down about a dozen more times, without me there to catch him.

I decided then, this won't be the last time I have to let him go and do something where I may not be right there to catch him at the bottom when he falls. There will be times where he won't need me, even if I think he does.

He is going to be eighteen months in two days! And for some of you, that probably doesn't seem like a big deal. But for me, it is huge! He is already half way to being two years old! He is getting to be more and more independent.

I know this is only the beginning and I'm learning to take deep breaths as I watch him discover and try new things for himself. I'm learning I can't always be right there to catch him when he falls down and I can't always protect him from every little thing, because he has to learn what works and what doesn't work, even if that means scrapes and bruises here and there.
However, this doesn't mean I won't be here when he comes running to me to pick him up and hold him.

At some point, I'm going to have to let this little baby go and experience the world, even if that means he goes without me.

*Somebody send this to me when he is going off to kindergarten...*